CALL ME OUT

[bootyhunter]

CALL ME OUT:

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Currently writing Dandy (Space Dandy) / Rex Splode (Invincible) / and Simon Laurent (Infinity Train)

bootyhunter / himbomb / incelligent



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*Note: Sakamoto Tatsuma (Gintama) kaihentai and Asher Millstone (How to Get Away With Murder) moneyballer available on request



Also voicetesting Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc) googlybear / Eddy (Ed, Edd, n' Eddy) edboy / Reagan Ridley (Inside Job) madcryentist / Abdul Ali (Squid Game) aitbaar / Portia Davenport (Search Party) portialain / Elliot Goss (Search Party) confabulous / Fleabag (Fleabag) feminitwit / Johnny Bravo (Johny Bravo) pretteh / and Joel Hammond (Santa Clarita Diet) screechy

Comments

cw: violence, nsfw, boners, just cursed content

[himbomb]

[Rex wipes sweat off the back of his neck as he attempts to skulk back to his room following an ungraceful exit from a questionable midnight threeway. He clings desperately to the towel around his waist, but unfortunately encounters a fairly large, non-living obstacle on the way back to his makeshift murderschool dormitory.]

Uh oh.

[Blood isn't a sight that's all that unfamiliar to him. In fact, the smell is what tips the young Guardian off first.]

Isn't all of that dying shit supposed to be happening tomorrow? Fuck! Oh, fuck! If anybody spots me standin' over this dickhead, at least, I think it's somebody with a dick... 'Cause, damn! I'm pretty sure he's got one of those dead guy hard-ons...

[*Priapism! It's a real thing. Anyway, Johnny Bravo is dead.]

Shiiiiiet! It's the himbo with the honeycomb hair!

[sixthnonsense]

[While Rex is loudly contemplating whether the deceased has a boner or not, around the corner comes another of the men with unusual hair. Though he should have been back in his room a long time ago, Hagakure unwisely spent some quality time in the arcade with a steady supply of snacks to keep him going. Unfortunately, exhaustion caught up with him anyway.

Any hope of sneaking back to his room to crash is immediately snuffed out when he spots Rex standing there. Funny enough, he doesn't see the body at first...]

Huh? Splodude? What're-- waugh!!

[He takes a step and immediately slips on...oh gods. Oh gods that's blood and he just fell on it. Not only is there blood, there's...!

Anyway don't mind Hagakure, he's just going to fucking scream in horror?? He's seen plenty of bodies but he's never stumbled into one before. Literally stumbled into one.]

H-H-Holy shit!

[himbomb]

[For Rex, on the other hand, a body is just that- A body. He’s had to trudge through hundreds by now, and mass carnage is always easier to get through if you look at it like it’s some kind of numbers game. Despite his callous behavior, he does feel bad for the deceased, but his reaction is incredibly de-amplified. Rex empathizes with the now late Johnny sort of the way one would feel pity for a friend who stepped in a pile of old gum.

When Rex speaks, his tone is oddly glib… And somewhat difficult to read.]

I’m guessin’ this is a bad time to ask if he’s still breathin’, huh…