CALL ME OUT

[bootyhunter]

CALL ME OUT:

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Currently writing Dandy (Space Dandy) / Rex Splode (Invincible) / and Simon Laurent (Infinity Train)

bootyhunter / himbomb / incelligent



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*Note: Sakamoto Tatsuma (Gintama) kaihentai and Asher Millstone (How to Get Away With Murder) moneyballer available on request



Also voicetesting Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc) googlybear / Eddy (Ed, Edd, n' Eddy) edboy / Reagan Ridley (Inside Job) madcryentist / Abdul Ali (Squid Game) aitbaar / Portia Davenport (Search Party) portialain / Elliot Goss (Search Party) confabulous / Fleabag (Fleabag) feminitwit / Johnny Bravo (Johny Bravo) pretteh / and Joel Hammond (Santa Clarita Diet) screechy

Comments

[incinerhater]

[Ah. Robert's fed Flambae a few delectable morsels of information with those answers, the first being that he really doesn't own many articles of clothing, which tracks for the guy. He owns workout gear that looks like it was stolen off of a junkie's corpse on Sunset Boulevard, his dinky little supersuit, and his even dinkier office uniform. Flambae wants to pipe up and insist that he could even make something for him, but that is a request that Robert may eventually end up happy about being spared from.

After all, Flambae might just make him an outfit that's similar to his own supersuit, although instead of flames printed all over the bodysuit, the design would probably feature an overwhelming smorgasbord of tiny penises.

Instead, he chooses to focus his attention on the dingy bathroom comment, finally seeing an opportunity to flirt, especially without the pressure of being around their nosy coworkers.]

Oooooh.

[He shakes his head as exaggeratedly as possible, obviously groggy.]

I can assure you that my dick looks good even in the worst of lighting, Robert.

[He flashes a smile that's more confident than spiteful, and less toothy as well.]

I think I'll learn how to make you want me even if the surroundings happen to literally be dogshit, I mean, this is fucking LA, come on!

[Flambae snickers. For such a seemingly derisive sound, this laugh is a lot more subtle. There's more affection in it than derisiveness.]

Especially if I starve you first.

[bobbob]

[ Leaving crumbs for Flambae and he doesn't even realize it ...

But no, he's not fully against being dressed up. It could even be ... fun? He's not sure, it's not like he does these kind of things often. Or ever. Even if he went to some fancy superhero function before he was probably just wearing his super suit.

He thinks he's doing pretty okay in life without an outfit decorated in tiny penises though. ]

Yeah but we'd still be in a dingy bathroom.

[ And Robert cares about germs, evidently. Bathroom germs at the very least. And yes, the "yeah" does indeed mean that he is agreeing that Flambae's dick would look good in any light. But whether or not that's read into, he doesn't care!! Rather, he's going to move right along in that throw-away way he does like when he makes blowjob comments to Invisigal and everything. ]

So you want to go on a date in the shittiest, dirtiest place in LA. Oh boy, can't wait.

[ That affectionate tone he senses in Flambae there makes him feel warm and he grins a bit himself.

They may have reached the delirious phase of staying awake at this point. Tomorrow is just plain doomed. But he clearly doesn't care about that either, as his voice takes on a challenging tone. ]

There's no way you would starve me. Not in any sense of the word.

[incinerhater]

[God.

Hearing Robert's low, drawn-out scraggle of a drawl accompanied by his trademark sarcasm does set off an unfortunate chain reaction within Flambae, one that he'd fight desperately to hide, provided that he wasn't snuggled up next to the long-term object of his affections at present. The exhaustion he is experiencing from days of poor sleep and ever-present homosexual fretting is what allows him to laugh genuinely, maybe acknowledging that Robert is actually funny for what seems like the first time.

Once again, he accosts Robert's shoulder with a light shove, the kind so un-treacherous it reads more like a schoolboy's excuse to exchange a lingering touch with a crush. Ugh, his voice is sexy.

So sexy it's something Flambae almost decides to tell him.

Thankfully, Robert's typical contrarian foolishness saves the both of them from any of that.]

It's not my fault your diet is fucking abominable.

[oh shit he's not protesting]

I think I've met seagulls that eat better than you.

And I once saw one swallow a whole condom wrapper!

[HELLO???]

Used.

[bobbob]

[ It's true, Robert should have just stopped while he was ahead. Why didn't he expect Flambae to answer like this? Fool. Stupid fool. And yet! And yet, another peek at that genuine laughter from Chad actually just might make seagulls with used condom wrappers worth it. He likes that sound, and he likes what it does to the man's face, even if he can't see it so well at the moment when he's glued to the expanse of chest that he is.

He gives a light laugh of his own to the shove, which almost makes him cling to Flambae all the more.

But then he groans softly. ]

Oh my god. Well. I'm going to bed.

[ and he just... CLOSES HIS EYES?

After a few long seconds, however: ]

That is not better than I eat.

[incinerhater]

[Now that Robert's eyes are closed, Flambae can freely sport the goofiest, most humiliating expression of endearment that he is physically capable of with those chiseled features.

The dispatcher clings to him and he returns the fervor of that grasp. Is it any surprise that Robert likes to be held, well, no, considering his loveless and lackluster relationship history... But for it to be by someone like himself is still a surprise.]

You eat terribly.

[He states it with a matter-of-fact, joyful snippyness.]

The seagull fucking fattened itself on plastic and jizz, and that's basically what all Twinkies are anyway.