an ass man (butt also, just an ass) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bootyhunter) wrote2022-02-07 12:30 pm
bootyhunter) wrote2022-02-07 12:30 pm
Entry tags:
CALL ME OUT
Currently writing Dandy (Space Dandy) / Rex Splode (Invincible) / and Simon Laurent (Infinity Train)
bootyhunter / himbomb / incelligent*Note: Sakamoto Tatsuma (Gintama)
kaihentai and Asher Millstone (How to Get Away With Murder) moneyballer available on requestAlso voicetesting Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc)
googlybear / Eddy (Ed, Edd, n' Eddy) edboy / Reagan Ridley (Inside Job) madcryentist / Abdul Ali (Squid Game) aitbaar / Portia Davenport (Search Party) portialain / Elliot Goss (Search Party) confabulous / Fleabag (Fleabag) feminitwit / Johnny Bravo (Johny Bravo) pretteh / and Joel Hammond (Santa Clarita Diet) screechy
I AM SO SORRY ABOUT ALL THIS RAMBLY DIALOGUE
thinvillainousbottom lip with those gapped teeth, suddenly remembering the Bone Zone's stupid rumor and releasing it almost instantly. God, that fucking bastard is getting to him on a good day! What a loser, honestly...He's reluctant to give away anything about his childhood that's particularly specific or horrible, seeing how hard he's fought to be himself and not the token homosexual in any given situation. Even worse, his powers, his interests, and on top of that his fucking abilities, make him feel dangerously close to being a stereotype, although he doe his best not to think about it.]
I just... I've spent a lot of time thinking too much!
[What?]
You know, about... If some guy at work is actually into me, or... Just doing that weird shit straight guys do.
[That makes more sense actually.]
Where they slap each other on the ass and then act like neither one of them jerked off to the memory of it later. Or that it'd be weird, or disgusting, or anything other than...
I don't know. Just... A Thing? That somebody else could be into?
[He can't quite find the words for it, it's a difficult subject. But especially in regards to romantic or sexual relationships, he's had to think twice before pursuing anything openly and honestly, despite having worked hard on any shame he had felt about it in his early years.
That's a part of why he puts so much effort into his own appearance. Might as well like oneself enough that it'll pull other men into the orbit, even if it isn't the ones you actually want.]
If I am flirting with a guy, for example... The majority of everybody fucking else doesn't think, or wouldn't think that it was, aah.
Something he wanted, right? Don't get me wrong! Vice versa, that is... Pretty fucked up, too.
A lot of girls used to try and get at me when I was younger, probably because I was quiet... And... Tall? Two things that women seem to apparently like in a man, and... It was pretty flattering, I'll be the first to to admit! But, when I told them they were barking up the wrong tree, they seemed pretty flabbergasted.
[He's just glad that he has the suit now. That tends to speak for itself.]
And I'm almost positive that in front of most of them, I had fanboyed pretty hard about Mariah without talking about her ass or tits.
It's a low bar, I know, but... Don't you think they should have known?
[ASLKDJAFSKDJFASKDJF]
Like, what straight man calls her Mimi? If you know any, I think we need to put them on a census. Something very strange is going on there.
IT'S ALL GOOD IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
[ But that's the only teasing quip he'll get out for this conversation for now. He knows it's serious, and he is taking it seriously. Sometimes it just seems that he can't help himself around Flambae.
He gets it, though. Even with the world opening up a little bit about sexualities and genders and hybrid species or aliens and everything in between, things are just always at least a little bit different for anyone who isn't just straight. Even Robert benefits from being perceived as a straight man whether the assumption's been correct or not. His brow furrows a little, since he hadn't thought much about this due to that, and he suddenly feels a bit bad for Flambae. ]
It's not weird, or disgusting. I don't think you'll have any problem with the Team.
[ Their assholery aside, they're like a weird, stupid family now. He knows Flambae knows this, but understands how nerve-wracking it must still be. He thinks the rest of SDN will also not be complete fuckheads about it, especially if they just deal with Phenomaman on a daily basis. But still, he wants to help the guy he cares about anyway that he can. ]
And if anyone tries to make us feel otherwise, I'll tell them to go fuck themselves.
[ He, hoping that he's not about to have a human fireball on his hands again, places a kiss against Flambae's chest. ]
Sternly but professionally speaking, of course.
[ Considering he beat a man on live ass television though, there is no telling how professional things could possibly stay. He's sure they won't have to worry about that though.
Flambae's teen years sound a bit insufferable actually, not that Robert didn't have his own kind of hellish time growing up. But he curses anybody who made the younger version of him feel insecure or bad or unwanted. ]
But yeah, they definitely should have known.
[ If the flaming super has never been in the closet, the rest of them were just in denial in the presence of a tall and cool young man. That's a them problem. Also, as a not-quite-straight-but-acts-pretty-straight kinda guy, Robert will never, ever refer to Mariah Carey as "Mimi". Ever. ]
no subject
[Is this about the team, or the thinking-]
They are very good about things like that.
[It's why the Z-team, for all their flaws, really does feel like family. The lot of them are bad at speaking directly about their feelings, so instead they communicate by fighting each other hand to hand or word to word, and using thinly-veiled defensive mechanisms to keep whatever's left of their hearts safe.
The kiss to the chest makes him curl up, in on himself but also onto Robert. He hates that he feels so giddy about it, but maybe it's time to let things be. For whatever reason, he and Robert have not had a chance to experience this. Stepping down from both violence and blustering bullshit has been terrifying, but...
Robert's kindness is going a long way. This is certainly a humbling experience. He's also scared that after tomorrow, he won't feel comfortable speaking, or that maybe Robert will come to his sense and realize that this isn't something he wants, so...
Flambae does his best to get things all in the open now.]
I am not like the others. Well, I am, we are... We have all been arrested, obviously!
But they have never met any of my boyfriends, or... Anyone I was ever serious about.
[Prism has, but he isn't talking about her. Also, her critiques of his exes and past situationships have been wildly accurate, to the point that it's embarrassing at this rate.
He's so caught up with thinking about that, he doesn't seem to understand the gravity of his own words, even though they're sincere.]
It will be a shitshow.
Let's just hope we both survive it.
[And that is enough emotional nudity for now-]
What do you want for breakfast tomorrow? You seem like a pancake or waffles sort of guy.
no subject
Surprisingly? Yeah, they are.
[ he loves each and everyone one of those stupid idiots. not as much as he loves Flambae but.
Suddenly Robert's life is full of people he loves and not just people he feels obligated to save.
With Flambae curling around him a bit more, he shifts himself to get more comfortable. They should definitely, certainly be sleeping by this point if they have any hope of being functional at work in a few hours. But also, most of that hope has been lost with the fact that the Z-Team's dispatcher is a fully fledged twitterpated shmuck who's just scored himself his first boyfriend in ever or at least a very, very long time. Yes he's in his 30s but it's going to be hard not to be giddy and weird all day long.
Chase will definitely make a comment.
(But even he will inevitably be happy for Robert)
His mouth quirks up in a little bit of a smile, like he's got a secret but the secret is just that he's really content, even a bit excited, at the moment despite all the embarrassing and vulnerable emotions being flung out onto the table. ]
We will.
[ He's survived worse, obviously. They both have. After all, Flambae has both lost some fingers and been thrown in jail. Robert's nearly died more than a few times and everyone at work is constantly attempting to embarrass him as it is. In fact, he should have a trophy for how good he is at deflecting them. ]
And anything but donuts. [ seriously, can we lay off the donuts for a week. ] I don't think I've had pancakes for years.
i need to review the game canon ALKDJFA but would he have seen-
The members of the Z-team all have their perks. Punch-Up and Coupe are reliable teammates, both seasoned combatants with their own respective upsides. Punch-Up is friendly and reliable, while Coupe's efficiency and penchant for silence is something that Flambae appreciates, as someone who has the tendency to be quiet and unapproachable in his default state. Malevola is cool as hell even if she is weirdly familiar, and Sonar, while extremely irritating at first, has an endearing tendency to shoot the shit and express an interest in actually spending time with the rest of them outside of work, which feels especially nice after having felt like an outcast. Waterboy is pathetic, sure, but in a cute way, especially now that he has learned the law of the land and has stopped wasting perfectly good food. Flambae is also oddly invested in seeing if the kid finally decides to lose his virginity any time soon. Golem is fucking hilarious, he's easily Flambae's second favorite Z-teamer, and Invisigal is working on herself despite being severely antisocial initially, which Flambae has a good deal of respect for. Prism is hysterically funny, unabashedly herself, and unafraid to speak her mind on top of being an incredible artist and versatile team member. The fact that she can be such a bitch to all of them and yet can turn on the charm like no other is... Inspiring, honestly. Then again, the girl is magnetic when she wants to be, and if you just so happen to be her hot-tempered bestie, she'll go to bat for you even when you don't deserve it.
Which is often, he knows.
That's the relationship he's most worried about if this gets serious- Her vibe and Robert's are so... Fucking dissimilar. She'd absolutely hate his taste in media, he's certain. And clothing, but... Can you hate someone's taste in clothes when. It's so clear they don't even think about them, anyway-]
Oh!
Is the memory of that old man's ass burned into your brain as well? Granny? More like Fried Fanny, am I right? Jesus. It must have smelled terrible in there.
[He has to laugh, shifting his own body in a way that keeps poor Robert from shuffling too much. Gingerly, he pulls a nearly translucent set of covers over half of Robert's body, since Flambae provides most of the heat himself, then taking a moment to really touch him.
The five-fingered hand moves up and down through Robert's hair, ruffling over the back of his neck and then curling deep into the strands right at the top of his head, digging his fingers in with a pressure that's meant to be like a comforting massage. The gesture is intentionally bawdy and wordlessly intimate, meant to ease Robert into slumber but give him something to remember later, especially when Flambae's hand moves from Robert's hair to his shoulders, fingers splaying over the scars and freckles before they finally flatten out over his back.
He leans in to kiss what he can reach of Robert's forehead, wondering if any of the affection he can provide will be enough to compensate for whatever vibrance the city has wrung from him, if there was ever any vibrance there to begin with. Not having had pancakes in years despite liking them is a huge red flag, as they're a common diner breakfast staple and often an easy breakfast to make for someone you just fucked the night before. They're simple, hard to fuck up if you top them for with the right amount of butter and syrup, which means that Robert has likely had very little sleepover sex if any in his days as MechaMan, and come to think of it, the guy probably neglects breakfast altogether.
He probably downs an ungodly amount of black coffees and then suddenly finds himself in front of the vending machine, ordering an extra packet of twinkies for lunch. At 3 PM probably, god, it's depressing just thinking about it.]
Pancakes it is.
[He smiles to himself. The people he loves the most all seem to share the same breakfast food- Prism, his niece, and now Robert.
Reluctantly, Flambae turns his attention towards Beef, who has been waiting patiently at the foot of the bed. Also... Possibly intrigued by whatever Flambae is doing to Robert, because... Usually Robert is the one doing that to him. Can dogs see that clearly?
Flambae should ask Robert if the portly puppy usually sleeps with him, and he will, but he has to squeeze in one last potshot before the night is over. Pulling Robert even closer to his chest, he waggles his brows at poor Beefy.]
Hey, here's a question you have never heard before...
[Each word is dripping with the kind of indulgent, self-satisfactory smugness of one of Sonar's former classmates when closing a business deal. Flambae thinks he is so funny...]
Can I keep him?
granny? YEAH....
It definitely isn't fair to hate on Robert's choice of wardrobe when he barely has a wardrobe to begin with. ]
Yeah. It seems like donuts have been showing up a lot more recently after all that.
[ And it feels like it should be the opposite?? There's also the fact that Waterboy gave him a bunch of soggy ones, and Invisigal smashed one on his keyboard.
At least Robert didn't have to smell Granny's cooked ass.
It's almost strange to be sort of 'tucked in' the way he is right now, but he doesn't protest. It's comfortable and nice, Flambae's fingers (all five of them this time) seem to know what they're doing, and Robert probably could just drift off to sleep like this. The kiss to his forehead makes him feel light and silly things again. But then —
Beef!
He can't forget about Beef. And Beef hasn't forgotten about them. In fact, in response to that smug declaration of intention from the firestarter, the pup gives a determined 'boof' and starts pawing furiously at the side of the bed as though this is going to help him accomplish the task of hopping up there with his rotund, stubby body.
Robert laughs a little and twists back some from his former position of clinging to Flambae's body. ]
Aw, buddy. Don't listen to him. We're a package deal.
[ If you can't deal with the Beef, you can't deal with the Robert.
Of course if Flambae really doesn't want him in the bed he'll respect that. As long as they can lay a towel or something on the floor! Beef always gets to be comfortable. ]
Can he come up here?
no subject
Oh, he’s so going to regret this, but the fact that he’ll be washing the sheets pretty soon anyways means that Beef should be able to sleep comfortably too.]
I think he is heavier than you.
Does the two of you usually sleep together?
[This is another odd thought, but in context, it makes sense how much Robert cares for Beef.
It’s starting to sound like he’s the only source of tenderness the man has had over the past few years. And by the looks of it, he isn’t even that old.]
Where did you find him, anyway?
no subject
Robert laughs a bit at the weight comment (honestly probably true, Beef eats better than he does anyway), settling back down against the other hero's side once everybody's on board. The pup in the meantime circles and sniffs for a lap and then plops himself up against Flambae's other side. This is his method of telling Robert's new flame (hahaha) that he accepts him. Also, it is very very warm and that's nice. ]
I sleep in a chair, remember?
[ He eyes Beef for a few moments and then gives Flambae a look, like he's challenging him or something. Anyway, he does spend a lot of time with the dog. Beef is very loved, and clearly loves Robert very much.
After a moment, he settles a little more, closing his eyes. The dog is already snoring. ]
I guess we just kind of found each other. I feel like he's always been around.
[ Yes it does seem that a fat chihuahua has been the only source of love or tenderness for Robert for at least a handful of (dog) years. Don't worry about it. ]
1/2
Yeah, but maybe he sleeps in your lap while you rot away in that chair, I don't know! This is the first time I am watching you fall asleep!
[that sounds so suspicious even tho it is sincere ALSDKFJ]
no subject
Still, as cool-guy as he tries to be about it, it's always a shock when seemingly innocent creatures seek him out first. It means a lot more than he ever lets on, touching something deep inside him, pushing back at a notion that's been difficult to shake, as the question of his own personal monstrosity is constantly up for debate.
Even the fact that Robert is here, falling asleep in his arms after accepting a lot of things so willingly, feels like it will all disappear the second he wakes up. Flambae can't quite allow himself to fall asleep just yet, especially since he's curious how Robert's body will change when he's finally conked out. Sure, he'll relax a little and his breathing will slow down, but what will all of that feel like against his own broad chest? Flambae wonders how Robert sounds when he is comfortable in a natural state as he runs over his itinerary for tomorrow morning.
His alarm is already set, he'll make pancakes for the two of them before Robert awakens and set aside some meat for Beef, and try to get Robert out of the house at a reasonable time so he can make it to work. All the while, he'll have to pick up those flowers from the store and make it to SDN looking coiffed and suave as ever because... God forbid he look sweaty or disgusting when he's trying to be dashing. Flambae does feel empathy for Robert, make no mistake, as it sounds like he may have had it even wore than a vast majority of supervillains over the years. They may be unreliable, double-crossing motherfuckers but... Even they've had their indulgences, their friendships, their trysts.
MechaMan (III) doesn't seem like he's had much of anything in his time as an active hero, other than a routine ass-kicking and a recently acquired canine cutie. It's selfish, something Flambae is working on, but despite the sadness he feels for the shorter man, he's thrilled.
If he works hard enough, he thinks, he can prove himself worthy. He can worm his way into Robert's empty personal life and finally see to it that the man is eating and sleeping properly, and that he maybe even develops a special interest that isn't directly tied to his employment. They can furnish that shitty apartment together and maybe, just maybe, reach a state where they're something serious, something real and permanent.
Silently, and only silently, he wonders about the last time Robert heard the words, "I love you." For Flambae, he can recall it even though it's been some time, and he hadn't trusted it. The phrase had felt manipulative at the time, like the idea of love had been weaponized against him to push him in a direction he hadn't chosen for himself.]
Get ready to catch the best multiple Z's you've ever had the chance to receive, motherfucker! Maybe tonight, you will finally learn what it means to get some real beauty sleep.
[He wants, so badly, to kiss him on the lips.
But just like with Beef, he doesn't wish to disturb Robert if he's already asleep.]
Goodnight, Robert.
I'll see you tomorrow.
no subject
Beef has a bed.
[ he says through a yawn, like it's super normal for your dog to have a bed while you have a plastic chair.
All the things that Flambae has an inkling about, wants to feel sad about, are just normal to Robert, which actually may make it even sadder. He doesn't really think about these things much, something nicer or warmer or safer will just happen and he'll respond like "Wow, that was great" and that's that. He's got a long way to go. This isn't a terrible start though, really. This grindr set-up could have gone so, so much worse. Knowing his luck it probably should have.
If Robert was to be asked when the last time someone told him they loved him was, he might not be able to answer. He's sure his dad has said it before, but he's been dead for fifteen years, and his son has been consumed with avenging him and keeping the family business alive. There hasn't been time to remember things like that. He's sure he's mentioned a "love you" to Beef a few times, but of course the dog isn't going to say it back.
But maybe now, finally, he can take a moment and see what it's like. There's a long way to go, but it's a possibility when before it just seemed distracting or unnecessary.
It certainly doesn't take him long to fall asleep when he's feeling happy and warm and safe. Beef is snoring but soon Robert's breathing slows and gets some weight to it. Whether he heard Flambae's goodnight or not is questionable, but he seems to be very peaceful as he snoozes away against the human space heater's gigantic chest.
When morning comes, he first notices that it's not as warm suddenly when it's just him and the dog laying in the bed (Beef has migrated to laying on top of Robert and he feels a little like his chest might cave in because of it, but it's fine). Eventually he makes his way upright, shuffles around to put on his clothes — he'll have to wear the same shirt even if he does own more than one to wear for work. Didn't really think the whole sleepover thing through. Ah well.
With the buttons buttoned and the shirt at least halfway tucked in, he emerges to the smell of pancakes and butter and just ... general homeyness. His eyes in the meantime are assaulted with the ensemble that is Flambae's morning routine.
He is such a weirdo. But Robert is smiling about it enough that his slightly less sleep deprived eyes crinkle at the edges as he reaches up to smooth his hair down a bit. He knows it's sticking up a little in the back. ]
Good morning ...
no subject
He’s finishing up a special glaze over one of the finished pancakes, running some fire from the tip of his finger over some sugar he’s sprinkled over top.]
What?
[He notices the look. There’s that mocking smile again! Ugh, it’s fucking cute though, especially knowing what he does now.]
You think perfection just happens? This shit takes effort, Robbo, effort!
[Somehow, miraculously, the 5 o’clock shadow is back. He ushers Robert over, pulling out his chair to that modest dinner table, which has been pretty notably cleaned up since last night’s fiasco. The dishwasher is currently running, and how early he got up to pull all of this shit and vacuum is a mystery.
He’s probably fully naked under the robe, however.]
Come, sit! And try one.
See if you like it.
It is a little sweeter than my usual recipe, because I know your tastebuds are totally fucked.
[He’ll set Robert’s plate down near that chair, along with a clean fork and a knife. Wow… Domestic much? If any of the Z-team members could see him now, they’d never let him live it down.
He’ll also saunter over to fuss with that upturned hair, thank you. It’s mostly an excuse to touch Robert, but he’ll try and pat some of the edges down with a clean hand.]
You look like a pigeon.
[One that has just shit itself, but he’s trying to be romantic here.]
Did you sleep well?
no subject
Nothing. It's just ... very you.
[ It's also crazy that the 5 o'clock shadow is back. That's some wild genetics right there. Decidedly, yes, he does look better with it, though if he has to get used to Flambae shaving it off every night after a certain hour that's fine too. If only Robert was the type of man who would see this whole beauty routine and think damn I should really take better care of myself too. Alas, it will take more than that.
Sitting down at the table, he takes in a whiff of the pancakes and thinks he likes what he smells. Not that he'd be hard to please, since this is the first time anyone has made him pancakes anytime remotely recent in his life.
He wisely chooses to ignore the pigeon comment, though doesn't fuss to much about the fussing. Instead, he smiles up at Flambae for a moment, and then leans up to steal a kiss against his cheek before he settles back down in the chair again. ]
I slept very well, yes.
[ There is a small huff after that, because he can just sense that another comment about how actually having a real bed like a real person will work wonders. Yes, yes, he knows! He expected this. But Beef and Flambae were with him and it was warm and he was exhausted from all the emotional gymnastics, so yeah ... he slept like an absolute log.
Then he decides to cut into one of the pancakes and scoop a bite up into his mouth, and ...
Holy shit. ]
These are— Mmgh. [ He quickly swallows the bite he's in the middle of and looks over at Flambae like he's the eighth wonder of the world. ] These. Are great.
[ He has really been missing out these 15+ years of having no pancakes. But the added sweetness? Is just right too. ]
this is a sweeter expression but my paid expired
He touches his face with a hand where he was kissed gingerly, covering his mouth because he must look so utterly pathetic. A moment passes as he turns to take his seat across from Robert, now shifting his hand to lean on it, although he’s still keeping his fingers pressed over the area Robert’s lips grazed.
Flambae has always been good at cooking, a skill easily bolstered by how it went so hand in hand with those natural abilities he’s so very proud of, but it is strange to have it appreciated by someone who isn’t Prism. Most of his dates are far more casual, he’ll go bar hopping or maybe pick a nice spot to eat, but this sort of treatment is reserved for someone special.
Robert doesn’t need to know, and he likely won’t, only the look that the dispatcher gives him makes Flambae feel wildly giddy too. He does his best to try and flash that confident, beaming grin of his even though he can feel his heart thundering away in that broad chest.]
Yeah?
[It would probably do him good to say something, but for once he has no remarks. Robert looks so happy. It’s easier to impress him with food than in a fight, but…
Flambae shouldn’t get his hopes up. Of course MechaMan’s standards for the second thing are a lot higher.]
Well, the glaze for them is custom, so…
[He gestures with a glowing index finger.]
You better let me know if you’d like any more.
noooo, the worst
He knew, of course, that the firestarter liked cooking and had some skill with it, but he didn't really expect this. Somehow. Maybe because the cooking is directed at him? Maybe because he just expects everything to be on the same level as a twinkie or a 3am taco.
Once Flambae has sat down as well, he digs into the pancakes more earnestly, giving a nod to acknowledge that he'll ask for more if necessary. He won't eat too much — he has to get to work on time, and he's going to eat at least one package of twinkies or a chocolate bar later so — but honestly, seconds couldn't hurt right? The glaze ... he wouldn't have ever even thought of that, and it's genius. But you can't just apply the word "genius" to anything that Flambae does, that's insane. ]
I might have some more. But you should eat first.
[ He went through all this trouble, he can't just not feed himself. Robert also glances around the freshly cleaned apartment for a moment. A portion of the mess was Beef ... ]
You should have woken me up. I could have helped.
no subject
Flambae had spent a good, long while gazing at Robert when he had felt the dregs of sleep finally slipping away, terrified at first. The events of last night had been so happy and sudden, a part of him had expected to wake up to nothing, an empty bed and an even emptier apartment, save for a few empty bottles of tequila and half-rolled joints on the table. Then again, the fantasies he's had about Robert and MechaMan have been a lot less realistic, and a lot more violent, too.
Robert looks peaceful when he's asleep, something that doesn't happen all that much during their stressful workday. He's got those stupid long lashes pale men have and don't deserve, and before forcing himself out of bed, Flambae had tried counting some of the ones on his shoulder.]
And how would you like to have been woken, Sleeping Beauty?
[There's that mocking tone again, only this time... It's very much not entirely a joke. More of a suggestion. Flambae is utilizing the kind of tone where he's """joking""" but actually totally serious, provided that the other party is down...]
With a kiss?
Sleep over again and you can help me next time.
[He takes one of the pancakes he had used to test the recipe, a little crispy at the edges. For himself, Flambae adds no glaze or syrup, simply taking a knife to the butter dish and spreading just a tiny dab of butter over it prior to taking a bite.]
Honestly, these are little sweet for my tastes. But! Counting calories is for cucks, so.
[he says that but with that shoulder to waist ratio of his.... gang... something is going on there]
I might as well join you.
no subject
His brow arches at the mocking, slowly chewing his way through a pancake as he considers this answer.
Honestly yeah, where was his good morning kiss? Thought they were serious about this. ]
Maybe.
[ In reality he's not upset he didn't get a wake-up kiss, he's just teasing Flambae in return. But of course he is also not entirely joking about it either.
He does intend to sleep over again though, so they can work all this out then perhaps.
The comment about being too sweet and cucks and how he might as well join in has Robert rolling his eyes a bit. ]
Oh. Well. Don't let me keep you from more important things.
[ He is the last person on earth who can justifiably say a word to anyone else about getting a proper meal in. And yet here they are. That waist to shoulder ratio definitely did not come from eating sugar glazed pancakes frequently though, everyone in this room is aware of this. But the only thing that really matters is that Flambae decided to join him and he's content with that.
Breakfast together can be their last little hoorah until they have to get back to the office grind and go to work and — well, he doesn't know what's going to happen at work or how normal he'll be able to act or how long it will take for any of the Z-team or Blazer or Chase to say that Robert, Flambae, or both of them are being freaks for seemingly no reason. Whatever happens, there won't be a lot of quiet time during the day. ]
I should probably finish up and start getting to work. That cool with you?
no subject
But all of the images has gotten blurrier now, enmeshed with the far more vivid, real flesh and blood encounters from last night. Now he knows what Robert sounds and tastes like when he finishes, and that maybe he’s tired of putting up so many walls.
Flambae hadn’t expected Robert to let the firestarter get inside him so easily, even if it was with just his fingers. Is Robert really all that forgiving, or does he just care that little about being alive?
Either way, perhaps if Flambae does his best to protect him, he can write those wrongs over and over again.
After staying remarkably quiet while he eats, Flambae reaches for Robert’s hand and squeezes it.
The size difference is strange- Not unwelcome, but bizarre. Flambae usually dates the type of man who could kill him where he stands, visibly. And as much as he loudly proclaims that he loves the thrill of that, he’s grown a little weary of it.]
This is important, too.
[If you aren’t fine in here, you’ll fuck up out there.
And burn out.]
Do you remember the last time you kissed anybody goodbye?
[Flambae can’t say he does.
It’s almost on purpose. If he thinks about it, all he will be able to remember is that it hurt too much.]
no subject
He doesn't know either why he let things go so far last night, not that he regrets it. Obviously yes he was very horny, but maybe also just kind of starved for that kind of intimate connection, intoxicated by being desired. It would be hard to admit something like that, but it isn't wrong.
Whatever's going through Flambae's head is a mystery to Robert, who is just sort of watching him curiously as he finishes up his breakfast. When his hand is taken, he allows it of course, even gives a bit of a squeeze in return. He wants to kiss those fingers again. He wants to say sorry.
But he expected sass as a response and instead gets something rather sweet and honest, so he smiles a little. ]
It is.
[ All of it's been important. For them learning about themselves and them learning about each other. Even for Beef who got the meal of his life and the warmest, coziest sleep to top it off.
But the question throws him off a little. Does the fiery former villain want to make fun of him? No, it's probably not that, even if the question does make some part of Robert's chest hurt a little. Of course he can't remember. It's been years since he dated anyone, and any member of his family ... well, it might have been his mom who last kissed him? The memory is just not there for him to recall.
He takes a breath slow and steady to kind of clear the heaviness of it all away before he finally shakes his head. ]
Not really, no.
[ To lighten things up a little (at least for his own sake if nothing else), he continues with a little smirk. ]
Why, looking to change that?
[ Please kiss me goodbye, is what he means. ]
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Sometimes, in the midst of all the peacocking, Flambae does feel a good helping of embarrassment creeping in. He puts in a lot of effort only to get a smidgeon of the attention others seem to have no problem in attracting, or so it seems in his own warped mind anyway, and for what? He wills himself to stop asking stupid questions that Robert clearly doesn't have the answer to, the man can be dead in the eyes but he's not difficult to understand, it seems, and people don't often answer truthfully anyway. God knows Flambae doesn't, although his caked up ass is out considerably a lot less than Chad's.
For now he knows a few things. That Robert spoils his dog but neglects himself in any facet of his life that involves pleasure, yet when it comes to the private company of others, seems to want it desperately. He finds great excitement in the kind of torture that doesn't end in his own death, and enjoys being kissed more than most of Flambae's ex-boyfriends.
The firestarter carefully peels the eye patches off his face and sets them on the table, and then quickly snakes his foot around one of the legs of Robert's chair, yanking it so that the dispatcher is close enough to lean over and kiss. Both hands don't just cup Robert's face, they're gripping it, and maybe brush away any wayward pancake crumbs as his drag over the skin on the sides of Robert's mouth, tracing the lines that get more prominent when he smiles.]
no subject
And he likes these silent parts of Flambae too, even though just yet he isn't good at deciphering what it could mean. There are, probably, thoughts going through that head of his, but what are they about? Maybe eventually he'll figure some of it out. Either way he gets to enjoy the view for a moment or two until the leg of his chair is tugged forward.
Honestly, that's kind of a smooth move and Robert's a bit mad about that. But he only makes a sort of startled sound that melts into the beginnings of a laugh before the kiss smothers it right out.
It's a good kiss, too. Maybe the retired-ish hero just does really like to be kissed, but it makes him feel important and cherished, two things he never really thought about all that often in his adult life before.
He kisses Flambae back for as long as he can before he needs to push back for some air. Probably he's got that stupid, airy, twitterpated sort of smile on his face (this vibe, you know) as he looks at the man in front of him. ]
Thanks...
[ Seriously, it was really nice? It's a really nice send-off to the chaos that is SDN. ]
See you in a little bit, then?
1/2
Flambae had placed a lot of significance, definitely far too much significance, on his weird, largely imaginary rivalry with MechaMan, only to have so deeply misjudged whatever was going on under there. A part of his fervor during their """fated""" (re: finger-relieving) encounter had tied into that, a desire to see if he could really do it, if he could burn through the armor and catch a glimpse of the hero's face when he was afraid.
And yet here and now, he looks so different, he's happy and it's so much nicer to see him wear an expression that Flambae isn't entirely certain the man has sported in years, and he himself is the source of it-]
2/2
And flashes Robert a winning smile.
What the fuck is going on here-]
Yeah, yeah! See you.
[not the eyebrows again]
And maybe the rest of you-
[He'll very obviously give Robert a once-over.]
If I catch you changing or some shit.
[Into what he's already wearing his work uniform...]
Remember, don't lift without a fucking spot. Okay?
It'd be nice if we could, I dunno, catch a movie or something later.
[He should start getting ready.]
Have you ever seen "The Lord of the Rings?"
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What the fuck is going on here indeed. ]
Yeah we literally almost fucked.
[ He reminds Flambae with an amused grin as the other gives him a once-over. Seriously though he isn't going to change clothes anymore. Unless he decides to work out. But he did promise that he would let Flambae spot for him if he did.
For now, he kind of reluctantly stands up so he can get on his way to the headquarters. ]
I saw that when I was a kid.
[ Since he's got the height advantage for these few moments, he steps forward into Flambae's space to kiss him again. ]
Movie sounds great. [ One more kiss. Just one more. ]
Be good today.
[ Now he's going off to fetch his dog... ]
this is a placeholder but it is stupid jokey fodder here
Does he talk to you like this?!
[ALSKDJFLADSJF]
Be good today... Be good today, my ass...!
[He's overjoyed.
Flambae isn't going to fight any of the kissing- Not now, at least. Whatever stupid dialogue he had up his very tight sleeve re: LOTR is forgotten... He will see you at work, Robert.]