an ass man (butt also, just an ass) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bootyhunter) wrote2022-02-07 12:30 pm
bootyhunter) wrote2022-02-07 12:30 pm
Entry tags:
CALL ME OUT
Currently writing Dandy (Space Dandy) / Rex Splode (Invincible) / and Simon Laurent (Infinity Train)
bootyhunter / himbomb / incelligent*Note: Sakamoto Tatsuma (Gintama)
kaihentai and Asher Millstone (How to Get Away With Murder) moneyballer available on requestAlso voicetesting Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc)
googlybear / Eddy (Ed, Edd, n' Eddy) edboy / Reagan Ridley (Inside Job) madcryentist / Abdul Ali (Squid Game) aitbaar / Portia Davenport (Search Party) portialain / Elliot Goss (Search Party) confabulous / Fleabag (Fleabag) feminitwit / Johnny Bravo (Johny Bravo) pretteh / and Joel Hammond (Santa Clarita Diet) screechy
no subject
He doesn't want Robert to go.
It's a rare moment for sure, to see Flambae so taken with surprise. When the realization hits him, his lips part and he looks frightened again. He knows that even crushes for him are all-consuming, what with the obsessive tendencies he's developed over the years, but this is bad. The man is a few centimeters away and it feels as though they're on opposite sides of the room. Flambae knows he's in for it the second Robert leaves his apartment even though they will be showing up at the same office, as the familiar creep of loneliness and doubt will sink in again.]
Um, a-ah...
[Say something.
God, fuck, sad gay yearning makes him so ugly. He swears whenever he has an unrequited crush he turns into that hideous little bald thing from Lord of the Rings. What was his name? The one who was always hissing and collecting too much jewelry...]
If this gets any more serious later, he will definitely be seeing all of me, FOR WHICH I AM SORRY!
[Why is he screaming...]
Since, my balls are right here-
[Don't gesture to them?!]
And his are gone. Snip-snip!
no subject
He's not really sure if that's what he's hearing but it sure is a choice to raise his voice like that for no reason. ]
I really don't think he cares.
[ He responds in that deadpan voice of his as he finally grabs his phone and is able to sit back up on the bed. And snap a picture of Flambae gesturing to his balls. Hilarious.
But seriously though no more interruptions. ]
no subject
Stupidmotherfuckeryoudidnotgetthegoodside!
[Of his nutsack? Yeah, hopefully, that topic is not broached again.
Angrily, he'll grab one of Robert's ankles and drag the attached leg upwards, shoving it over his shoulder and repeating the motion with the other side. Whatever, he'll be rough again, muttering an onslaught if incomprehensible curses in a variety of languages. Some Spanish, some Afghan, and something vaguely French sounding, all peppered in between kisses and bites to Robert's midsection.
It's not until he takes Robert's cock in his mouth again that he's quiet. What is it about blowjobs that make him go on autopilot? For him dicks are sort of like adult pacifiers, although that is something he's never saying out loud lest it gets to his sister, because he would one day like to see his niece again.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
He's slower at the start this go around, moving up and down with the intention of savoring the sensation of Robert in his mouth, this go around, doing his best not to let the nerves get the best of him. The truth is, he'd like to do more for him but is scared he'll take things too far like he always does, so he'll rely on the elevated temperature of his body, only even in his mouth things are getting hotter.
It's probably his own arousal. Thankfully, they don't have to think much about it, seeing as he's not on fire as of yet.
When he has to take a breath, it's unwilling. He practically pries himself from Robert's prick, panting harshly, nestling his nose right under the base.]
Move your-
[That's not right.]
Cross your legs.
Behind my head, like you're...
[Choking me.]
Shutting me up.
no subject
For now though the phone kind of flips in one hand to the other and then unceremoniously bounces onto the bed as Robert's leg is suddenly taken captive in an angry flourish of several languages— ]
Whoa- hey! Shit—
[ At least the device is much closer now so if one of them wants a sexy picture, they can get one. Unfortunately that thought is rapidly growing distant for Robert once Flambae starts using his mouth again. He doesn't even complain after the initial exclamations when the other leg is grabbed and put into place. He is beginning to suspect that Flambae has a fixation on sucking dick in particular, but he has very little to complain about with that actually.
The only thing he will complain about is if suddenly he's on fire. Hard pass on being lit on fire.
Robert groans as this toothless motherfucker practically pulls arousal right out of him again. For a moment there he'd almost forgotten how much he feels like he's burning up with desire.
He's not very convinced that anything can shut Flambae up at this point, but as he pants softly, he wriggles a bit to cross his legs as requested. It's a bit awkward of a position but really no worse than sleeping in a plastic chair. ]
Odd request coming from you, but alright.
[ Sarcastic retorts are how he copes with his own horniness and how the alternative sounds to come out of him would have been lewd enough to make even the strongest perverts on the streets of LA blush. He'll still be making those anyway, though. Especially since it's becoming more and more difficult not to just be sincere tonight. ]
no subject
[Sure, he loves giving head, but it’s more that Flambae finds his metaphorical and physical knees buckling to get Robert off. Because when he’s sucking him dry, it’s less embarrassing, somehow, to look up at the dispatcher the way Flambae is doing now.
He feels so hot, below the belt and with every wayward thrust and incredibly satisfying sound that Robert is making. He too moans with his mouthful multiple times, losing his ability to even pretend that there’s anything other than carnal nonsense on his mind.
Since he’s kissed Robert’s cock up and down, he now knows which part of it’s the most sensitive. The veins are familiar, would Flambae be able to recognize him from just a picture? God, he hopes when Robert gets drunk or horny late at night he sends stupid and disgusting photos, dick pics with shitty lighting… They’re terrible but Flambae finds when needs a man that badly, it’s actually nice.
It means they can’t control themselves, that they’re thinking of you.
The added pressure around his neck isn’t helping. He doesn’t quite gag, although he releases Robert to cough a little, looking up between Robert’s legs hopelessly. He’s not begging for an out or anything, but he thought the roughness would bring him down from cloud nine a little.
It doesn’t, he’s still hard as ever.]
Did you want me to…
[God, hands, where are his fucking hands? He can barely get the words out.]
Put my fingers inside you?
[And, as if to apologize for the seemingly insane request, he takes Robert’s entire nutsack into his mouth.]
no subject
Imagine if this was Shroud, just knowing every single thing that was about to happen and lying there like a dead fish to accept the inevitable.
Nasty. What a nasty existence. Even Robert's existence isn't that sad.
He's getting a thrill out of this, as is evident by the sounds he's making and how he unfortunately can't do a thing about the lewd way his cock throbs in between Flambae's lips. He keeps his legs tight, though he has no actual intention to hurt Flambae. Not in a biting his finger off sort of way. He also knows that, because of the superpowers and the fact that the man is much too large for his own good, it's more difficult to actually hurt him. Besides, he asked for this... ]
Nngh—
[ The needy groan is the only thing he manages to reply at first. His ability to process intelligent thought is once again threatening to leave him behind with nothing but a heavy haze of arousal and horniness.
The question, when he processes it, makes his stomach dip like he's on a roller coaster. So it's pleasant and terrifying at the same time. The thought of Flambae's fingers — and something else of Flambae's — inside of him sends a searing jolt straight to his dick.
Guess he really does have it bad for this guy. ]
Yes. Fuck, yes.
[ He answers breathlessly, putting his hands over his face in another stupid moment of shyness. He's not very experienced with this particular act. Probably. So he's a little worried. A lot embarrassed. He has no desire to be handled with kid gloves (his body has clearly been through a lot of trauma so this is nothing), so he suggests nothing of the sort. Flambae is a veteran gay anyway so he's not concerned that this would be handled poorly. It's just ...
Well he's embarrassed because it's been a long time since he's pursued something indulgent and pleasurable and whatever the hell else this is. That he's just basically asked for something instead of always doing his best to do something for everyone else. And he doesn't know how to make this scenario snarky and sarcastic or deadpan in that special way he has with Flambae. It's too real... ]
no subject
on that dickwith his mouth???, engulfed in flames and everything.Robert's legs feel nice against his neck. They tighten with the twitching of his cock, which is such a satisfying horny detail, Flambae will absolutely be thinking about for nights to come.
Now he does figure out what to do with his hands, at least after spitting out and and spitting on Robert's balls, then pressing soft kisses to them as he reorients. He splays flat, warm palms over those banged up thighs, just taking a good few seconds to torture the other man by peering at him wickedly.]
Yes?
[Maybe this is too disgusting, but isn't that what Robert seems to like? In the most irritating way possible, Flambae is careful to press his chin against the base of Robert's cock, doing his best not to use the kind of pressure that's uncomfortable. He then rubs it from side to side, miming a sort of "Tsk-Tsk," motion as he clicks his tongue in tandem.]
You're being awfully shy, Robert. Why don't you let me see your fucking face?
Then I'll give you what you want so badly.
[Flambae isn't thinking about it now, but in a way, Robert has given him so much. Considering their history, it's probably foolish to trust a common criminal with something as delicate as what is probably his first intimate encounter in a long time. Then again, Robert is the whole reason he even considered re-orienting his life path in the first place, as jail time and the lack of employment options for ex-cons have sort of forced his three-fingered hand.]
I take back what I said about your ass earlier.
It is... Flat, as all hell, oh, absolutely-
[RUDE!!! He's just trying to get a rise of out him...
but he hath already risen (i'm sorry god)]
Like the Earth all those early people imagined!
[Flat Earthers... butt the og historical kind]
But it's nice.
I can't wait to make it feel-
[There's so much nasty shit to say, but he'll keep it brief.]
Tender.
no subject
No. I'm not.
[ He says that through his hands, so yeah he is being kind of shy. Or he's crashing out? One or the other. Either way he just needs a moment. Although Flambae slipping back into their familiar banter with one another does actually help more than annoy him. Amazing.
In reality maybe he shouldn't trust a former villain that he himself canned with something like this. But they've been on the same team for months now, and the same part of him that feels like kissing him is just a hello knows that trusting him with something so intimate is something he can do without regrets.
It's the comments about his ass funnily enough that get him to drop his hands off to the side again. Although he does loose one leg from around Flambae to give him a little shove with his foot. ]
Alright, that's enough.
[ Blame his dad and mom
(?? what happened to Mrs. Mecha Man...)that he's not caked up, he can't help it. Also Flambae is just unnaturally large, like many superpowered people, so of course his ass is just proportionate. It's science, or something like that.Which is all to say that yes, fine. Flambae can look at his face now. Flushed, freckled cheeks, pupils blown out slightly by lust, his lips parted a bit ... all of it. ]
Happy?
no subject
He can’t tell Robert how he really feels, because to do so would risk ridicule. Ugh, the dispatcher despises when Flambae uses words like this but he looks so cute all worked up. The touch of color to his cheeks make the freckles stand our more , and his stupidly adorable brown eyes, the indicator of how he’s feeling, finally look at peace in a horny way.
If they had met at a bar, or didn’t even work together, Flambae would do his best to be smooth. He’d wax poetic about how Robert’s skin looks better when he’s been exposed to a little superhuman heat, and how the warm temperature really agrees with him, but that can all come later.
For that, he’ll kiss Robert’s junk a few times- Softly.]
Yes.
[Flambae often resembles a cat when his face is at rest, a good deal of it being that his eye color is more commonly found in nocturnal, non-human creatures.
He’s giving Robert an intense look from where he’s perched. It’a curious and excited.]
Are you?
[God, he’s probably gone and killed his boner-buzz.
Flambae knows he needs to stop talking and get to work, but his lack of communication has totally combusted shit before. He needs to be honest.]
Whatever we do tonight…
[He doesn’t know how to make it sound sexy or confident. That it feels like such a privilege to make Robert happy, to pull him out from beneath his little MechaMan-induced raincloud and cover him in something warm.]
It’s for you.
[God, he’s going to regret saying that.]
Like, I am… Having fun, obviously, I think I am harder than that bitch Queen Victoria’s diamonds…
[christ]
But it’s been nice.
[A beat passes. Should he say it?]
Taking care of you.
I didn’t think I would like it so much.
no subject
What throws him off in this exact moment for a second is the question if he's happy. People don't really ask Robert that very often. Chase probably has, or at the very least thought it. So even if it's right in the middle of having sex and Flambae is literally perched right against his dick, Robert's lips tilt up quietly. ]
Yeah.
[ But shit, now he doesn't even know how to respond. Everything that's being said to him is so heartachingly sweet. He knows that Flambae is more than just a loudmouth diva, but he wasn't expecting this admission.
Thankfully the heat in the room (thanks) and the flush of desire possessing the dispatcher right now make it so you can't really tell if these confessions have made him blush or not. There is a limit to how much he'll allow himself to be embarrassed you know? ]
I think you might want to do something about that.
[ Being harder than Queen Victoria's diamonds (he thinks they are King Charles III's diamonds now) sounds really uncomfortable, and Robert knows this because he is in a very similar state. The random kisses and touches that he is getting from Flambae intermittently are just winding him up tighter and tighter.
But he does think he can't just pretend like those nice, gentle things hadn't been said to him. Flambae keeps ruining the moment over and over (and Robert does the same but this ain't about him) but this is really great actually. Who knew that being taken care of really would be a wonderful thing? Why does Flambae think Robert gave him such an enthusiastic 'yes' just moments ago? Because he's happy, and he's having fun, and he likes this.
His expression softens a bit and he reaches up to brush his fingers affectionately against Flambae (he won't touch his hair).
Crazy how much he wants to kiss him right now, even if his mouth has been on his balls very recently. ]
I didn't ... think so either. But I do, when it's you.
[ He'd rather say these types of things when his dick isn't bobbing around and half his body isn't just hiked up off of the bed, but it's no less genuine either. ]
this is for like. the ether the reason he did not respond to the phenomenal drag is that
He looks up at Robert, with that quiet, curious eye contact once again. It turns out that he is capable of looking soft, and is taking in every earnest word. His lips twist into an expression that is almost a smile, because even though he is happy and hopeful and horny, he's not sure that what Robert is saying is true. It's not that he doubts the other hero's sincerity- He is pathetically sincere, to the point of being corny.
It's that Flambae doubts himself, as it seems that he can catch men easily, but in trying to keep them, they're always scorched as they slip right through the gaps in his fiery hands. So, he'll kiss Robert's fingers one by one and get back to work, hoping he hasn't totally turned him off. With each wet, sloppy bob of the head, it's becoming clear to the hotheaded hero that holding out is going to be impossible, so he does his best to reach for the bottle of lube that is just swishing about in his bedsheets.
Only... He is struggling to grab hold of it, on account of everything being so wet and sticky-]
...Fuck. Why is this-
[He tries grabbing it again, only it slips through his fingers.]
What the fuck? None of this is on the outside, no?
[WHY IS IT SO SLIPPERY]
Then there would be a stupid puddle everywhere.
Damn! The universe must really hate you, Bobbert.
[ASLKDFJASKDJFSKJDF DON'T TURN THIS ON HIM]
It's like God doesn't want you to get laid or something. What is happening?
i take it back i am scared
He does feel apprehensive about being taken care of, but everything Chad has done for him so far— bumbling and fumbling aside — really has been nice. More than he was imagining it would be. For some reason, when Flambae looks at him quietly, he almost thinks something sweet and magical is going to happen. When will he learn? Probably very shortly, but still. Even the way his fingers are slowly kissed is almost weirdly romantic, if he was not also in the middle of getting an intense but really weirdly drawn out blowjob.
Robert groans, not sure if in protest or in pleasure (maybe a bit of both), and immediately feels his sexual frustration skyrocket into outer space as the mattress around him jiggles and jostles with Flambae's three-fingered attempts to grab onto the ...
bottle of lube.
What the fuck? ]
For fuck's—
[ Actually, yeah, it does feel like God hates him right now! Thanks for pointing it out on top of leaving his dick unattended again, Flambae! Very helpful, very sexy.
Another groan leaves him, this one almost like he's in the middle of a battle against a supervillain. Actually, no, this might be his supervillain origin story. ]
Will you- [ DEEP BREATH ] I am going to lose my entire mind if you don't stop fucking around right now.
[ He even shyly but enthusiastically told you what he wanted, he thinks he deserves the universe to chill out a little and let him get laid, and he thinks Flambae can help out with that!! ]
no subject
[Maybe he really is on antidepressants? Yo, that'd be a plus actually, even if it makes this situation harder... And even if he isn't, maybe this is practice.
He'll bring a hand back to Robert's cock again, running his thumb over a vein that feels like it really is going to pop from the pressure. Thankfully, he manages to grab hold of the bottle and switches his hand for his tongue and lips again, although not before quickly exclaiming-]
Oh fuck yeah! We are so back.
[This motion is fairly swift, especially since he's concentrating, and he's able to uncap the thing and pour a little bit over his three-fingered hand, choosing to go all the way down on Robert this time, no matter how uncomfortable.
He slips one finger inside of Robert, doing his best not to breathe fire from the excitement he's feeling. Robert is warm and wet and through his own haze of pleasure it's hard
and he's hardnot to spill white on white sheets from the feeling of being inside him. His willingness and desperation, as well as his fucking stamina, Christ, are so unexpected.Flambae was sure he was some kind of passing interest, yet another flavor for someone to try and spit out when it got too hot or goddamn controversial, but maybe there's a chance for the two of them after all.
He'll just need to make himself useful.
Shit, he needs to come up for air, that urge to cough is reckoning again-]
Fuck, Robert.
[He's breathless again.]
Did you know you could get this wet?
using this icon is a little out of pocket but
Certainly not evidenced by the way he almost squirms when Flambae runs his thumb over that vein on his cock.
And definitely not by the way the entire room is spinning when his entire length just disappears into Flambae's mouth. Or the finger that slips inside of him in a rush of adrenaline. ]
Oh, shit—
[ Combine all that with that dirty, filthy question that he's asked when the firestarter surfaces for air and his lips are glistening and he has a certain lusty look about them, and ...
Well.
Robert can't hold back anymore. His stamina is something to write home about, but he's been strung along so much and how many times do you actually think he's had another man's finger in his ass (especially in recent years?) and — it's just too much. It sends him right over the edge in an orgasm he barely has time to think about let alone warn for.
His hands come up over his face again. He feels like a teenager who just got his first handjob from Becky from 2nd period math class. But damn, it feels good ... ]
1/3
2/3
3/3
Usually, before men get to engaging in this kind of thing with other people, they'll play around in bed or in the bathroom by themselves, but Flambae has a sneaking suspicion that maybe Robert has not done so much of that.
He unceremoniously checks the state of his lubed up finger first, and, hey! The guy really did clean up after all, then immediately moving to loom over Robert a little bit. It is best that he does not get too close, after all, the poor thing is embarrassed no matter what he'll try to say, so maybe they're due for a little off-color humor to make things seem more... Familiar.]
So...
I guess this settles the score then, huh? One for one?
[He says it, joking a little, but, shit.
There's too much gentleness in it.]
Robert!
Are you... How do you say, fine? Okay?
[Ugh, those marks he left with his own mouth are starting to look nasty. He'll have to make sure they tend to them properly- They'll be sexier after they've healed up a bit.
Maybe Flambae will get a chance to see them tomorrow.]
Is there anything I can do for you?
There's no need to be shy.
no subject
It's also a good thing he didn't see that looking at his finger or he might die on the spot and not in a good way. Of course he washed, even though he had no idea where they would go or what would happen on this date night.
He still doesn't. ]
Yeah. [ He pushes out a puff of air and drops his hands, amused and resigned all in one. ] I guess it does.
[ Fair is fair, he supposes. He fully intended on holding out and all too, but having your ass intimately touched by your crush xoxo is actually far more intense than he could have imagined. The dispatcher definitely was not warming himself up in bed (he has no bed) or the bathroom.
His heart does funny things when he's asked after, once again because it feels unexpected and he just isn't used to it. Not from Flambae for sure, but not from most other people either. He ends up giving a little half smile that could either be interpreted as embarrassed or amused. ]
I'm ... doing great, actually.
[ It's the truth, even if he did finish accidentally. Even with the most drawn out blowjobs of the century or perhaps all time, he's been having a lot of fun on this ... excursion.
He thinks about apologizing for coming so suddenly too but considering Flambae literally gulped it down like it was nothing ... maybe it's a non-issue. ]
Maybe a little rustier than I thought.
no subject
This is so tender, he's almost thankful that reaching out to touch Robert is totally out of bounds, considering his fucking goopy fingers and all. He always has some shitty comeback, stupid or otherwise, but he can't really think of one.
It's because despite everything, Robert doesn't look dumb, or pathetic, or laughably miserable. He seems legitimately at ease, something that doesn't often happen, even when the Z-team is having a good time.]
You should really consider greasing the wheels every so often. Even during a dry spell, Robbo~!
[Some of Flambae's excitement has gone down, but weirdly enough, he doesn't seem angry about it. The fact that he's at least earned himself a tie, in some twisted way, is enough.
The sex can come later. Now he has a little better of an idea what Robert is and isn't so keen on.]
Neglect yourself for too long, and you'll get violent.
Then even the most fucked up of fucked up bullshit will feel like...
[He mulls over his words with a low murmur.]
Something else.
[And yes, unfortunately. The finishing in his mouth is sort of a non-issue- As long as it doesn't get in his hair or his eyes he's pretty okay with it. It just means he was doing that great of a job! But was he?! Don't give him this win.]
no subject
But first he raises a brow and answers in his near monotone sort of voice: ]
Okay thanks, coach. I'll keep that in mind.
[ It's not like he was in a "dry spell" on purpose. Well, it kind of was on purpose but only because he's been solely focused on Mecha Man and Shroud, and then later the Z-team despite all of them being horny as fuck probably 24/7. Something tells him if this ends up becoming a steady thing, he won't have to worry too much about keeping the wheels greased.
So he moves on with a roll of his hand gesturing at Flambae's ... somewhat still living erection. ]
Do you need to, um ... [ Wait why is this awkward ] Can I help?
[ He would! It's fair. Either way he won't make a big deal out of it. At least he'll try not to do that, and he thinks he's better at things like that than Flambae here. ]
no subject
Still, Robert's offer is sweet, no matter how awkward.
As a little treat, he'll respond with a cool, nonchalant tilt of the head, sliding off the bed and getting on to his feet.]
Sure.
Come with me to the bathroom.
[That way they can both get cleaned up if they need to. And, just in case they can get a good shot of anything nice-]
Bring your phone.
no subject
Okay.
[ He's a little curious by the invitation, having been taken off guard several times this evening. But he takes two seconds to center himself and then slides off the bed as well, scooping his phone off the sheets along the way.
Getting somewhere they can clean up a bit actually sounds great too.
The best part of all of this is that Beef is just having the time of his little life outside of the bedroom, having beautiful dog dreams of shrimps and toys he isn't actually going to fetch. ]
no subject
The former ex-con is seated cross-legged across a slightly damp bath mat, now clad in a pair of tiny, cheetah print Calvin Kleins, with dark, freshly washed hair falling over broad shoulders. He presses a clean paper towel against the bite on Robert's shoulder, doing his best to ensure that the wound is dry prior to applying any ointment.]
So...
[He's seated Robert over the (closed) toilet, having had the decency to place a clean towel under the dispatcher while he examines the injuries Flambae himself is responsible for. In the heat of the moment, he may or may not have totally disregarded the fact that the other man has no healing factor whatsoever.
Which again... Is incredibly stupid, seeing as his scars are all fucking visible, but okay.]
I have good news and bad news. News that will make you go "Fuck yeah!" and "Boooo," respectively. Alright? Okay!
[It's mostly stupid chitchat. He's trying to keep the mood light again, looking for any signs of potential laughter, as if his cock wasn't in Robert's mouth a little ago. There is something downright absurd about how Flambae continues to babble like he isn't still thinking about how Robert tasted, and how timidly the dispatcher had been while covering his face when he finished, like he was some sort of cute horny Christmas present shyly waiting to be unwrapped.]
First of all, I was relieved to discover that your little dog is just fat! Not dead.
It is a good thing he is not allergic to seafood, because... I am pretty sure he has consumed all of it, whatthefuck...
[He is there as well, watching Robert curiously from the ground. Flambae had let him in while Robert had been brushing his teeth.]
He has expensive taste! Who knew? Meanwhile, you spend your days hobbling around and eating the kind of crusty sweets you find at a gas station...
[ASLKDJFAKDJFSDJFSDJF]
Covered in foul... Like, what kind of cream is that? I swear it is the same shit they put in all those weird-smelling unsold lotions only your Aunties with man troubles buy. You know, like the ones they sell on discount at Bed, Bath, and Beyond? Anyway-
[The Twinkie slander continues.]
And second! It turns out... Blue really is your color. But, mmm, maybe the red... And the purple? Not so much.
[Flambae tilts his head to the side, wondering if he should ask the next question. It's personal.
But that's what sex is for, isn't it? To loosen things up.
To make the talking easier.
He doesn't necessarily mind that Robert will probably do the opposite of telling him everything. Flambae thinks that he is going to have fun finding it all out.]
But... Were you the one who picked it out?
[The SDN uniform is standard issue, and the MechaMan getup is probably in line with the ones the prior iterations had. This may be an extremely roundabout way of going about this, but for most heroes, it's easy to tell what their favorite colors are.
But for Robert, is it really blue? Or is it just what everyone else has put him in?]
no subject
Originally he'd wanted to protest— he's had much, much worse — but it's clearly important to Flambae, and so he kept his mouth shut. Doesn't even laugh that apparently his body being an actual jigsaw puzzle of various battles and fights isn't enough of a reminder to a superpowered idiot that he doesn't just heal.
His head tilts slightly at the rambling, and there's a little smile on the side of his lips. ]
Okay, well. Counterpoint: Beef doesn't have expensive taste, he'll eat literally anything.
[ he looks at the dog criminal in question (whom he loves very very much). ]
You were a very naughty boy when I wasn't looking, weren't you Beef? Weren't you...
[ It's honestly a miracle that the dog isn't imploding from all the shrimps he ate. Of course Beef just looks back at Robert like he's the best most special, wonderful, amazing person in the whole wide world and it's clear that the dispatcher isn't about to scold him further.
Just. He wanted some of those leftovers too, damn. It would not have happened if he hadn't so impatiently taken his host's face in his hands, kissing him like he was starved and the pasta wasn't doing the trick at all. But still.
He ... doesn't really regret that. ]
Second counter: it's ... best not to think about what a twinkie is made out of.
[ His smile is kind of weird and fond for what just came out of his mouth, but that's because the way Flambae went on about it was kind of endearing actually. He has these larger than life descriptions about family dynamics that Robert doesn't have a clue about but are quite apparently important to him even in silly throw away comments. It might be a little difficult to not imagine that he's eating a twinkie full of nasty lotion, but Robert is confident he can overcome (so the twinkies are staying).
As for the more serious of Flambae's "news", Robert blinks, briefly caught off guard. Once again, these aren't the type of questions he's asked all that often. Even seemingly simple things like "what's your favorite type of donut?" weren't a full on attempt to get to know the man behind the desk. It was an ADHD thing. And a way to make fun of him.
He doesn't feel like he's being made fun of here. ]
You know, I ... do like the color blue. But I'm also not the one that picked it, really. I guess I could have really rebelled against the legacy if I decided to go out in yellow or something, but it didn't cross my mind.
[ even his whole One Other Outfit aside from his SDN uniform is a dark blue. He must just like blue.
He casts a glance down at himself for a moment and then to Flambae again. ]
How's the damage? I'm still fit for duty tomorrow, I imagine.
[ Physically. Mentally, he thinks it might be a close one. Most of it's in a positive way, though. The sort of light, fluttery excited way you feel when your crush likes you back, or you have flashbacks of his dick in your mouth and it makes your insides feel all squiggly.
Yes, tomorrow at work is going to be a challenge indeed... ]
am i allowed to type the twinkie line
In some ways, he's a bit jealous of Beef- Robert only looks at him with love and nothing else. Just sweetness isn't quite Flambae's vibe, but... The rollie-pollie of a dog has really been the only living thing that MechaMan has really been able to any love to in recent years.
The fiery hothead doesn't even realize that he's mirroring Robert's expression unintentionally, the corners of his own mouth turning slightly upwards as he listens, doubting the integrity of the Twinkie. Maybe that was the dead giveaway that Robert wasn't straight- That he'll swallow anything.]
Yellow will make you look sickly.
[He quips shortly, applying ointment to the now properly dry wound. It's strange, he was so sure he wanted to destroy MechaMan completely, but was that it? Were all the blows they exchanged simply an excuse to touch him? Even the impulse to engulf Robert in flames, though the kneejerk of rage had definitely prompted it...
To engulf someone's body wholly in fire is to consume them. Flambae can't say he's ever done that before.
And in this instance, he's really, really glad he hasn't.]
Let's just say you're lucky you'll be sitting on your ass all day.
[So Robert seems to really like blue, noted. Blue daisies for tomorrow it is.
Honestly, Flambae wishes he had the right sarcastic comment ready to go right now, but he's distracted.]
You've gone out in the suit when you've looked worse, haven't you? God, you're such a fucking idiot b-
[Right, he hates being called that.]
Baby. Idiot baby... Whatever.
[ALSKDJFAKSJDFASJDFKAJSDF]
You don't need to be doing that anymore.
Seriously! Otherwise, I will fucking kill you.
[don't say that so casually it
makes it seem even more sincere]
twinkie line is crazy
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
1/2
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
I AM SO SORRY ABOUT ALL THIS RAMBLY DIALOGUE
IT'S ALL GOOD IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
(no subject)
(no subject)
i need to review the game canon ALKDJFA but would he have seen-
granny? YEAH....
(no subject)
(no subject)
1/2
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
this is a sweeter expression but my paid expired
noooo, the worst
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
1/2
2/2
(no subject)
this is a placeholder but it is stupid jokey fodder here